FadingLosing hope in everything,Don't care what the future brings.We're all gonna die anyways,Why not tomorrow, why not today?Tell me the reason, my purpose in life,Tell me, why not suicide?Give me reasons why I should live,If I took my life, could you forgive?I'm sorry, I know you thought I was stronger,But I told you I can't take it any longer.You told me these things, I told you I'm not,I tried, I fought, again I lost.This battle with myself, I've had enough,Endured so much, depression's tough.Battling addiction of self-harm too,You have no idea what I've gone through.I wanted to tell you.. So many times I'd tried."How are you?" "I'm fine," I lied.When I tried to speak, the right words wouldn't come out,'Cause for so many years, I filled my mind with doubt.I was constantly bringing myself down,Never really felt like I was wanted around.When the time is right, my life I'll take.That'll be the last time I break.
For ThemKind words from friends pierce my heart,"Believe me" they said. Mind and soul torn apart."You're beautiful; you're amazing; you're so strong!"But everything in me tells me they're wrong.I know they wish that I believed,Thoughts inside are deceiving me.I wish I could just shut off my brain,Slow the anger, slow the pain.If I died, I know they'd be heartbroken..Death is always left unspoken.I'm really trying so hard,To erase my body that's been scarred.To recover for them, be made new,Avoid the bad thoughts, and shine through.
Just Another Lonely NightBroken downI'm torn apartYour games been playedYou've won againBrutality at its finestA black hole in placeOf what had me wholeSearing pain of death, aliveTearing another holeYour bullet hits home
A Writer's InsanityI talk to youBut you don't listenI scream to you for helpBut you don't listenI cry out in anguish for youBut you don't listenI fall to my kneesBut you don't see meI collapse within my mindBut you don't see meI welcome death's harbingerBut you don't see meI reach for your heartBut you don't feel meI touch your soulBut you don't feel meI give you my allBut you don't feel meI write my wordsAnd the paper listensI speak my thoughtsAnd the paper listensI show my emotionsAnd the paper listensI want to give upAnd the paper shows me the wayI feel hopelessAnd the paper shows me the wayI am lost in my painAnd the paper shows me the wayI cryAnd the paper saves meI hurtAnd the paper saves meI long for the abyssAnd the paper saves meI don't need you to hear meThe paper listensI don't need you to see meThe paper shows me the wayI don't need you to feel meThe paper saves me
What IfWhat if you had succeeded last yearTook enough to make your world go blackThose three words I would never hearThe friendship we wouldn't have got backWhat if I hadn't asked to see youHad already moved onDid you want to see me tooOr were you already too far goneWhat if you hadn't decided I was important againI was only a vague memoryWhere would we have needed to beginFor you to remember meWhat if we hadn't got back togetherWould we be better friendsForget about you, I could neverI don't want this to be the end